Warwick Accommodation admits it ‘hasn’t got a clue’ where Heronbank is

“The last person who remembers where we put it left in 2011,” staff say.

Warwick Accommodation admits it ‘hasn’t got a clue’ where Heronbank is

“We just give it to a group of kids every year and hope they find it themselves”, Chief of Beds Simon Herbourne told the Hoar. “So far nobody’s asked for help, and so we haven’t bothered to check.”

When asked why the location of the elusive halls was lost, Deputy of Kitchens John Ackmartin told us that the last person who seems to remember where it was left five years ago. “If you asked me to guess,” he said, I’d say it was over there somewhere”. (At this point, Mr Ackmartin waved his hand in the general direction of Lakeside.)

“It’s definitely, definitely in the vicinity of Library,” Wardrobe Purchaser William Estwood told us, “definitely. Without a shadow of a doubt. Yes. Is it the one on the way to Tescos maybe? Oh, Claycroft? What’s that?”

After twenty minutes of poking around the Warwick Accommodation offices, it was clear nobody really knew or cared. And to be honest, we can’t blame them. Have you ever spoken to anyone from Heronbank?