Top racists move to back Brexit

Leading British racists have expressed their support for the Brexit campaign.

Top racists move to back Brexit

Just three days before the EU referendum, the British Racist Activism Society has finally given it’s powerful support to the ‘leave’ campaigns.

Ian Toller-Ant, chairman of BRAS, announced this morning that his organisation would extend its “full support” to both of the pro-Brexit campaigns. He added that, should either campaign appear to “exhibit greater racist tendencies” than the other in these last days of the campaign, BRAS would be prepared to switch its allegiance.

Toller-Ant explained that “Brexit embodies much of what it is to be a modern, British racist. The modern racist likes to hide his dislike of people from other races behind a screen of free-marketeering and greater rights for small businesses.

“The Leave campaigns have done an excellent job of combining an unspoken distaste for non-Anglo Saxons with a touching faith in the word ‘market’ and its ability to solve all earthly problems.”

Shirley Shecantbesucharacist, long term Daily Mail reader and dogging enthusiast, explained to us that immigrants, house prices, small businesses and the survival of the white English are all linked by some curious mechanism of tabloid journalism.

Important pro-Brexit political heavyweight, The Rt. Hon. Letsnot Risk-Libel, said in a speech today, “We are obviously overjoyed at this clear sign that the racist lobby has joined with us to agree that Europeans are inferior to the strong, determined British.

“Let us take pride in our late trains, our street-drinkers and our mindless hooliganism. In our tuition fees, our delinquent youths and our growing economic dependence upon an unpredictable financial sector.

“Consider the dignity of our illegal arms trade, of our colonial heritage and of our inability to make infrastructure investment without risking civil war. The honour of our excessive regional wealth divide, of our obsession with the fate of Top Gear and of our determined desire to privatise all government services, regardless of consequence.

“Let’s also be proud of our parliamentary system: the face-off between the old Etonians and an opinion-less marxist in a charity shop jacket; the death of the Lib Dems and the rise of the Kippers; not to mention the underrepresentation of women, non-millionaires and under-65s.”

Letsnot Risk-Libel finished, “Above all, let us remember that the British queue like no others. That, at least, ought to prove that we need not dirty our arses by participating in the free trade agreements of our own continent.

“We’re British, and we shall wait for something better to come along. We deserve it.”