The Hoarchive

Satire, freshly squeezed from Warwick Uni

Scientists crack the formula for comedy

Surprisingly, it involves Facebook and pretend animals.

Scientists crack the formula for comedy

The boffins located in the Warwick Arts and Space Center have determined the perfect formula for achieving the ultimate banter and BNOC status on a university campus near you, from the comfort of your own home.

The Hoar secured an exclusive interview with Neil Croftstrong, one of their chief physicists. We asked him what his years of research have yielded.

Neil: “Studies show that preceding the name of any animal or object with ‘Warwick’ creates an astounding popularity boom”.

But where does such an arbitrary word come from?

Neil: “We believe this trend to have been started in Warwick University (located in Coventry, UK). What initially started as a joke from someone with too much time on their hands has snowballed beyond imagination”.

Not wanting our readers to miss out on the current trend sweeping the nation, the Hoar has come up with a handy step by step guide to feel like a BNOC despite nobody caring who you are:

Step 1: Log out of Facebook

Step 2: Create a new account with first name, Warwick, and a vaguely Warwick-related animal or object as surname.

Step 3: Spend increasingly large amounts of time on the new account. Live the likes.

Step 4: (optional) spend more time on your hilarious new account than your real one

Step 5: Overhear people you don’t know talking about your Facebook account.

Step 6: Realize you’ve made it big. You’ve finally got the validation you were craving.

Thonk you for reading , expgoosely those who’ve helped out and got involved.