The Hoarchive

Satire, freshly squeezed from Warwick Uni

Warwick in expensive Christmas logo scandal

Warwick has spent £80,000 rebranding Christmas, after the unprecedented success of the university’s own rebrand.

Warwick in expensive Christmas logo scandal

Christmas’s new logo features the celebration’s cleaner name, ‘xmas’, written under a Warwick aubergine-coloured, Father Christmas-style hat.

“The fresh visual brand represents a bold new approach to the communication of Christmas,” said press officer, Peter Dunn. “Christmas is a place of infinite possibilities where the only boundaries are the limits of energy, imagination and potential.”

It was subsequently revealed that Mr Dunn was given an inspirational-quote version of the word-replacement game, Mad Libs, in an office Secret Santa, which is thought to explain his meaningless statement.

Members of the student society Non-Aligned Leftist Forum are in a state of panic (although they object to a uniform description of their state) over the prospect of a public holiday being rebranded, or indeed branded at all.

Some students have hailed the rebranding a form of privatisation, and yet another gain for the political right in 2016. Jeremy Cunt has expressed his delight.

Warwick Business School has distanced itself from the rebrand, in an effort to remain amicable with it’s partner in corporatist corporatism, The Coca-Cola Company, famed for rebranding Father Christmas’s trousers in the 1920s.

The university has insisted that the Christmas rebrand was not undertaken to promote the university, but in the public interest, to make Christmas a more up to date, friendly and relevant holiday, more distinct from other celebrations such as Diwali, Hanukkah and Winterval.